Wednesday, December 22, 2010

How Exactly Do You Lose Weight?

I've often thought about this. I even tried to research it a long time ago (I thought I posted about that topic here but after minutes of searching it remains lost in the cloud) but came up with nothing. Well I did learn a lot about some other side effects of being fat but nothing about how fat is lost. 

After talking to some people and hypothesizing and theorizing on my own, I think I finally came up with a solution. If you want to know where the weight goes as you burn calories, hit the jump. Note: I'm only posting it over there because I will be talking about pee-pee and poo-poo and not everyone may like that. So take that as your warning.
I used to think weight was lost through poop. I have the ability to take the most massive poops known to man. They are so big I call them five pound poops (clever I know), because one time I weighed myself before and after the deed and I had actually lost five pound. And no I'm not referring to this time. In more recent times the size has diminished and on a good day they are on the order of one pound.

When I would go on a weight loss binge, I tended to become constipated because of my decreased food consumption. My own theory about that was because of the reduced caloric intake, I would begin to process food more efficiently to make up for it. Whether that is true is irrelevant. What is relevant is that I would not lose any weight for a week while also not pooping. Finally when I did I would lose weight in amazing quantities. So I assumed weight was lost through the poo. 

What may have been happening was that my body was storing the food weight while releasing the actual fatty weight in other forms. The weight loss and the weight storage/gain would cancel out and I would have no net loss until I was completely evacuated. So where did that weight go?

You see, you body sends mostly undigestible food into your colon. I'm sure some of your destroyed fat and muscle and other waste goes there too, but probably not in the quantity needed for weight loss. Instead I would like to argue that you end up peeing it out, or evening losing weight through sweat.

Think about it. Your body is made mostly of water. When you convert excess cellular matter into fuel you are basically breaking down molecules and mixing them with the other cellular material making a solution of liquid form. This liquid has to go somewhere, and that somewhere is to your sweat glands or your bladder depending on bodily designation. If it was in your poo, then you might be in for a rough night. 

This would also explain why you need to drink lots of water (all the time, but especially if you are trying to lose weight). Your body has just broken down a bunch of chemicals and is now festering in a tepid pool of it's own filth. It needs to be cleansed of this and the only way to do that is to replace the old nasty water with nice new water. Drinking more and more water forces your system to purge itself of excess liquid (making you pee more) but also removes the waste. 

Now I'm not saying this is exactly how it happens because I could not find anything that talks about this in depth, but it makes sense based on what I know and what happened this past weekend. I weigh myself every morning. Then for poops and giggles I weighed myself after taking a really long piss and I had weighed 1 pound less then when I weighed myself before. Now I've set the benchmark. No more will I depend on the pound poops, but I will have to rely on the pound piss!

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